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Getting Ready for Campus Life Print E-mail
By Fr. C. John McCloskey   
Sunday, 03 August 2014

Are your children heading back to college soon, or perhaps about to enter freshman year? Are you worried about how they will be able to buck the tide and remain faithful Catholics (or revert after being lured away) in the ultra-secularized environment of a non-Catholic college?

It may already seem too late to reverse wrong turns, but this is not necessarily so. The Enemy knows that tempting us to despair and to accept the inevitable is half the battle. In reality, hope springs eternal because God’s faithfulness – accompanied by his bountiful graces – is without end. So don’t despair! Ever.

Here are some ideas that, taken to heart, might help both you and your students prepare for their return to campus.

1. The best advice – make it non-negotiable, if possible – is that they seek a dorm or rooming situation that is segregated by sex.

Alas, the deck is already stacked against Catholic college students who live in co-ed dorms, where the culture’s amoral and largely anti-religious current is likely to be at its strongest. May St. Joseph and the Blessed Mother be their protection!

2. Here’s a truly radical thought: The purpose of dating is to find the person you wish to marry, the one who will become the father or mother of your children. Catholic parents should already have conveyed this perspective to their children; if not, don’t hesitate to open a thought-provoking, countercultural conversation that may plant the seeds of proper dating choices and behavior. That means your children should be ready to terminate a dating relationship if, and as soon as, they realize this is not the person with whom to share a lifetime and a family.

3. As long as you and your children are talking about dating behavior, pass on the time-honored practices that can help clear sex-fogged adolescent minds and psyches enough for young people to judge how worthy and compatible the person they are dating may be.

These dating rules include never allowing yourself to be alone in a closed room or parked car with your date. Plan activities that will provide opportunities for growth in knowledge of God, each other, and self. Make a regular practice of worshiping and praying together. Dress modestly. Regardless of who “pays” for the date, no one “owes” anybody anything. Avoid actions that cause sexual arousal – including forms of dancing and extended exchanges of affection that are designed to cause it. In short, help each other to say “no,” and give each other the chance to discover – and possibly fall in love with – a person you may one day decide to give yourself to for the rest of your life.

4. Ask your collegians if they have ever read the entire Catechism of the Church. Encourage them to do so (ideally, in those pre-college years that make it easier to impose required reading and pop quizzes). One cannot practice a faith that one does know.

5. Along the same lines, encourage them to frequent the Catholic campus ministry, both to receive the sacraments and to grow in the faith. Newman Centers, for instance, are now generally sound in their teaching – Deo gratias, after decades of confusion! And students will also find there others who are more or less serious about keeping and deepening their faith. Even nowadays, many college students meet their future spouses at college: What better place to begin a lifetime of faithful love than a sound Catholic center.

6. Explain that they are not at college primarily to “get a good job” (and mean it – the  job-related pressure many young people understandably feel is reinforced by spoken and unspoken messages from their parents).

Although someday soon they will have to begin earning their own way (ideally, shortly after graduation!), they should realize that their college years may be their only opportunity to dig seriously into areas like history, literature, music, art history, and culture. Even if they are budding engineers or pre-med students, they should not neglect the humanities, which, rightly taught, offer a perspective that will enrich their lives in ways that business study never will.

7. Depending upon their gifts and abilities, encourage your children to consider professions that can directly influence souls, such as teaching, politics, or the media (and I hope you are also encouraging them to be open to exploring a vocation to the priesthood or religious life – it is all too easy for the “still, small” voice of God to be drowned out in today’s culture).

I should reveal that I am on the advisory board of the Cardinal Newman Society, which has a wonderful Guide to Authentic Catholic Colleges. No, these are not Ivies or “elite” names, BUT your college student will get a much better education in living his or her faith than at a more prestigious but morally and philosophically bankrupt Ivy – or  selective tech college. And after four years spent building a solid educational, moral, and religious foundation, your son or daughter can always move on to one of those elite universities for post-graduate work.

From there we can hope they will prosper as strong Catholic professionals, and become able and willing themselves to evangelize for our faith in the workplace and among their family and friends.

 
Fr. C. John McCloskey is a Research Fellow at the Faith and Reason Institute, a former Catholic Chaplain at Princeton University, and a graduate of Columbia University.
 
 
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written by Jon S., August 03, 2014
Thanks, Fr. McCloskey, for both your excellent column and your work on the Cardinal Newman Society, which does such crucial work. I would just like to underscore your point that the humanities are important when "rightly taught." Given how rarely the humanities are rightly taught, even in "Catholic" colleges (excluding the authentically Catholic colleges accurately identified by the Cardinal Newman Society), wouldn't no humanities (beyond degree requirements) be better than postmodernist and politically correct humanities? Also, I was glad to learn that campus Newman Centers have become generally sound, but are the campus ministries of Catholic colleges historically associated with religious orders (again excluding those identified by the Cardinal Newman Society) also generally sound?
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written by Seanachie, August 03, 2014
Sage advice, Father...very timely...have shared it with family members.
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written by Patti Day, August 04, 2014
Passing this on to our daughter, who is homeschooling four. Two beautiful girls will go to college in the next few years, and then another younger son and daughter. I pray they all are able to attend a solid Catholic college.
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written by Jonathan Smith, August 04, 2014
That is great advice, Fr. McCloskey! Another great organization to look up on campus is FOCUS, the Fellowship of Catholic University Students. They work in conjunction with the Newman Center and do terrific work. Their mission is to launch students into lifelong Catholic mission. They will be at 100 college campuses this fall. You can learn more at www.focus.org. I also happen to work for them:)
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written by Paul V, August 04, 2014
Your article is filled with advice from my parents. Always three, seldom two and never one. University/College is great but don't forget the trades. You get paid to learn and no student loan debt when you get your ticket. Besides the challenges all Christians face at this time RC also have the added pressures of meeting others from different Christian denominations. It's important to not only teach your children what you believe but why you believe it.

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